So, a lot a lot a lot of things happened since 18th March (my last post). I turned 2. The day before my birthday happens to be the birthday of our dear Mother India. That day coming back from my aunt's place, I saw a towering building, decorated beautifully on the eve of independence with expensive lights and just in front of that building was a small boy, holding 5-6 Indian flags to sell, siting with tears in his eyes.
I do not know why he was crying but I know the reason is genuine and really painful. In a life where he probably doesn't go to bed with a full stomach, a life where he has never seen a hope of better living conditions, a life where he has been abused by others, a life where he is probably beaten everyday by a frustrated mother or a drunken father (if he is a little privileged to not be an orphan), for him tears are not such a bad thing. But yeah it moved me and the curious Pankhuri inside me yearned to know the reason specifically.
Well, I couldn't but I thought of spreading some happiness among these poor children. My cousin and I contributed some money, bought biscuits and toffees and went to various slums in the city and gave them a small independence day gift.
It was good and gratifying but the question is - Is a one day kindness act by two girls sufficient????
The problem is colossal!!!
No matter what I am doing now and what have I achieved, I have a quality that I dream big. Yes people, my dreams are very big.
I really want to do something for these people so that their life takes a 180 degree turn. This thing is not just to write but what I feel actually from the insides.
I do not know what, how, when, where of my dreams but if God helps I want to do this.
Anyways, so I celebrated my birthday then exams came so suddenly and in such large number that it felt as if Tsunami has struck.
The exams were not as expected and not at all satisfactory. I think if I concentrate only on my short term problems then this is the NUMBER 1!!!!
I know it sounds lame and people would not want to believe me but the luck suddenly went against me.
Here, suddenly, I remember the day when we won the laptops. How in that quiz I suddenly knew the last, winning answer which was from the area about which we had 'equal to nothing' information -- sports and how on the day of my FMS exam I didn't attempt my strongest section -- English!!!!
This makes me wonder how small and powerless are we??? We are puppets in his hands and he is such a wonderful gamer.
Every plan failed, every decision had to be changed and straight from the top of the mountain I fell in a deep pit.
The future is so bleak that even a torch's light cannot illuminate it sufficiently. But still I am positive, I don't know about what, but I am. I think I know it's just his another game. I kind of get this feeling that this has become his favourite game.
But, O my dear God, I want to tell you something " YOU WANT TO PLAY, PLAY. I DON'T CARE NOW. THERE WILL BE A DAY WHEN YOU'LL GET BORED OF THIS SEGMENT OF PEOPLE AND MOVE ON TO ANOTHER PEOPLE"
